(boy) Let me tell you a story.
A fairy tale. Kinda.
About a bunch of Tooth Fairies who lost their magic...
..and the adventure we all had to get it back.
It all started last Christmas,...
..when I was about to break the world land-speed record.
(announcer) Captain Tom Wallit is cleared and ready for takeoff.
(boy) I dedicated that historic moment to my mother and father...
..and to the memory of my sister Tolly, who had just recently been...
..eaten by bears.
- (announcer continues) - (woman whispers) Tommy?
- (engines die) - Tommy?
(whispers) What are you doing?
Keepin' an eye on your sister?
(hums)
(sighs) Yeah, Mom.
So I lied about the bears. But a boy can dream.
Harsh. Card's declined.
Really? (laughs)
No problem, I'll just... I'll write out a cheque.
Sorry. Can't do it.
You're the Wall of Shame, lady.
- The wall of what? - The Wall of Shame.
Happy holidays.
(screams)
(scream continues)
Ohh, honey!
Congratulations.
(groans)
We'll take it home, put it under your pillow...
..and tonight... the Tooth Fairy will fly in.
- Tooth Fairy? - Leave you a whole dollar.
- Shh. - Oh, puh-lease!
(distant thunder)
(whirring)
(bleeping)
(girl) "I Ate Dirt With Bigfoot": a Sceptical Examiner exclusive.
Yikes. What's next, Tooth Fairies?
(soft breathing)
(suction)
(suction stops)
(snores unevenly)
(suction starts)
(rattling)
- (bell dings) - (machine pumps and wheezes)
(recorded voice) Tooth in.
- (till rings) - Money out.
(rattling)
(coins jingle)
(sighs)
(radio presenter) Good morning, Metro Area!
Put those snow shovels away, it's gonna be another warm one today.
Probably our warmest holiday on record,...
..but don't let that affect your holiday cheer.
(coins jingle)
(gasps)
I like pennies.
And half a jam sandwich.
Weird.
Don't look at me. Dad must have done it.
It was the Tooth Fairy, stupe.
- Pygmy. - Yo-yo.
- It wasn't your father. - How come, Mom?
- Ugh. - I said how come?
Because he didn't come home last night, that's how come.
- (knock at door) - (both) Dad!
Can I help you?
You just do what you have to do.
And make it fast.
It's Christmas.
Next time I'll wish for some real money from the Tooth Fairy.
(plummy woman) Money makes the world go round.
(till rings)
And thanks to this little beauty,...
..we'll make plenty of it.
Right here in Fairytopia.
Money for a billion teeth a year.
Money to buy the world's Christmas presents.
Money's all we need.
But what about magic?
Who said that?!
Magic is for suckers. We haven't used magic since Mrs C.
She's living up there now.
She's got magic.
Care to find her? Be my guest.
But know this:
..others have tried,...
..none have returned. Chhh!
- (gulps) - Fairy Hunters.
Anyway, who needs magic now?
We've moved on to things that are much more modern and exciting.
(female announcer) Operative 7 2, please report to Quality Control.
(male announcer) 400,000 new teeth now arriving at Bin 42.
To commemorate Human Appreciation Week,...
..tonight's lecture is entitled...
.. "Children Who Floss and the Fairies Who Love Them. "
The Fairytopia Film Series presents The Toothinator,...
..starring Arnold Overbite,...
..followed by the classic Citizen Canine.
It's morning, people. That's a wrap. Get some sleep.
(groans of relief)
(male announcer) Now, hear this. The Christmas countdown has begun.
All fairies to be refitted and ready for Christmas duty...
..by sundown Christmas Eve.
Seven days from now.
This is not a drill. Repeat.: this is not a drill.
(lift pings)
Look at 'em. Fairytopia's finest.
Full of pep and zing.
And then there's...
(mouths)
Too... Too...
- Tooth. - ..ooth!
Drab. It's a... it's a good look for you.
Ohh!
What's in the bag, jerk?
Oh, look. It's empty. Like your wallet, Wallit.
"My Dad," by Tom Wallit.
"My dad is a master criminal."
Where is he now? Jail?
He's in a coma.
(man) Stage dive! Oof!
Daddy?
Hey-hey! How's my little brood?
Little fear-of-heights thing I'm trying to get over.
Toughening up for the big Greatest Hitz tour.
Throwing oneself from the stage into the arms of one's adoring fans.
January the 5th, 5.30 start.
Put the word out on the street.
Guess you must be feeling better, Mr Walnut.
Wallit!
(dog howls in distance)
The Sceptical Examiner calls me "a big fat liar"?!
My giant squid "a hoax"?!
Has the universe gone insane?
I'll get these people, I'll show them.
(snorts)
(distorted) Plug is the number-one...
..name in surveillance... and security... (dissolves into feedback)
(squall of feedback)
Plug is the number-one name in surveillance and security.
With thousands of cameras and listening devices around the city,...
..I intend to make it number one...
..in the hunt for creatures beyond our world.
I want 24-hour patrols across the city.
I want a live specimen captured.
Let's move out!
(henchmen) Uurgh!
Listen up, people. It's now just two days to Christmas. Let's look sharp!
(scream)
(Tom) Mom, she popped another one!
This was meant to be for Christmas morning,...
..but you look like you could use it now.
- # Use it now... - (discordant strum)
- # Use it now # - It's an IOU.
That's right, cos I owe you a great year.
I get a gold record, just one: whoosh. We're there.
- Spare us the rock-star fantasies. - What... what...
What... what's this... what...
Come on, darling, what is it? Don't you believe in me any more?
It used to be cute. Things change.
- I didn't. - They took the couch.
It's Christmas, we can't even afford furniture.
I'm gonna ask for some real money from the Tooth Fairy this time.
Yeah. Ask for a gazillion.
(parents continue arguing)
"Dear...
..Tooth Fairy."
"Help... us,...
..please."
(Tom) Maybe my mom and dad would have been better off in some other time...
..and some other place.
As explorers, maybe.
Once the world's greatest team,...
..they got trapped inside the Pharaoh's tomb,...
..with no source of food but each other.
- When that was gone, so were they. - (thunder crashes)
Bicuspid at 222 Sunset.
Incisor at 18 Elm Street.
Molar at 32 Broadway.
OK, let's move 'em out.
Move, move, move!
- We're movin', we're movin'. - (sigh)
Next stop, Mendelbaum residence.
Incisor, next stop.
It used to be,...
..when Mrs C was in charge,...
..fairies could fly...
..and holidays were for giving.
Oh, pffft! How about giving me a break?
Or me a Christmas bonus.
You can never be too rich or too thin.
That is one dead fairy.
Takes one to know one.
(all) Ohh!
- Tooth! - Look at you!
Gum disease has more personality!
All you do is talk about money, money, money!
Be crazy for a change. Live a little.
Sometimes I wear my Wednesday underpants on a Tuesday.
My hero.
What have you ever done, eh, Tooth? Your jam-sandwich trick?
Or the s... sponge cake in the air conditioner.
Or the night before that.
(alarm)
You're just a loudmouth and a loser.
If I wasn't such a loser, I'd find Mrs C and get magic back.
Find magic?! Piffle!
Dangerous nonsense.
Humans hunt our kind for sport.
There's a jungle of human wickedness between us and magic.
And you're no action hero!
- Geronimo! - (all) Watch the hip!
Aargh!
She's right. Better to play it safe.
Oh, yeah. Why rock the boat?
Next stop, Wallit residence.
Incisor.
"My name is Tom Wallit...
..and my dad invented shampoo, diet soda and the Internet...
..to help the modern world."
Whoa.
(Tom groans)
(mouths)
Get a job, Dad.
(man) The History Of Wall-to-Wall Carpeting.
(snores)
Wall-to-wall carpeting stands as...
(exhales)
(suction stops)
..foot after foot of plush, foot-friendly wall-to-wall carpeting.
Of all the different kinds of carpeting,...
"Dear Tooth Fairy,...
..help us, please."
(woman) What have you ever done, eh, Tooth?
You're just a loudmouth and a loser.
She's right. Better to play it safe.
Oh, yeah. Why rock the boat?
Rock the boat?
I'll show them "rock the boat".
(suction starts)
(till rings)
(klaxon)
(whistles)
- (birdsong) - (dog barks in distance)
(gasps, squeals)
Tom, wake up!
(murmurs) Come here, you hungry bears. She's over here.
- Tom, you gotta look! - (knocking)
Are you guys up? Dad's making breakfast.
Yeah, Dad.
Whoa.
It's real, Tom. It's not a dream.
If you're in it, it's a nightmare.
Go on, touch it.
- What did you do, squid? - Nothing bad. I wished for it.
A gazillion dollars. And she gave it to me.
The Tooth Fairy did.
Tolly, there is... no such thing.
Uh, yeah, Tom, there is!
Are you comin' out or am I comin' in?
Be right there, Dad!
All right.
- Are you telling? - Are you kidding? They'll freak.
Dad hates money, remember?
We gotta fake him out. Just do the usual stuff, OK?
OK, Tol?
- (brittle clunk) - Sorry. Toaster's busted.
Uh, great breakfast, Dad.
Gotta go to the library to do a... book report on Abraham Lincoln's dog.
Promise you'll clean your room before Christmas, or I'll do it myself.
(both) Promise!
- What do we do now? - We change the future.
We're just kids.
And we can keep on makin' mud pies and pickin' our nose...
..and playing with our food...
..or we can change the world as we know it. What'll it be?
Say the middle one again.
Forget it. Come on!
(# Dire Straits: Money For Nothing)
# Huh
# Look at them yo-yos That's the way you do it
# Play the guitar on the MTV
# That ain't workin' That's the way you do it
# Money for nothing and your chicks for free
# Now, that ain't workin' That's the way you do it
# Let me tell ya, them guys ain't dumb
# Maybe get a blister on your little finger
# Maybe get a blister on your thumb
# We got to install microwave ovens
# Custom kitchen deliveries
# We got to move these refrigerators
# We got to move these colour TVs...
I wanna buy the Wall of Shame.
# Owww-ow-ow! #
Hey, kid,...
..go buy yourself a personality.
(Tolly) Gosh.
I hope the Tooth Fairy doesn't get in trouble for this.
(alarms)
(announcer) Repeat.: code red. This is a code red.
Repeat.: code red.
Is this the Christmas party?
Operative 565!
The boss wants to see you!
Now!
(toilet flushes)
He used to work the cash machine.
Now he's cleaning toilets for the next millennium.
(whispers) One can only dream what's in store for you. (clears throat)
Ah, Tooth, good to see ya.
You look busy. Why don't I come back never?
Relax! Take a load off.
Can I get you anything? Coffee, tea, carrot cake? Or how about...
..a new career?!
- (whispers) Give me a break. - Excuse me?
I said it's a terrible mistake.
Ha-ha! You're funny, kid. (munches)
Three packs a day, I gotta cut down. (burps)
Look, kid, we got Christmas in 36 hours but we can't afford it...
..cos you just gave away a gazillion dollars like a deranged slot machine!
It was just a prank. So make more.
Make more? With what?
Ohhh... I got stress.
You fried the money machine. Three, two, one,... kablooey!
Go ahead, run. They're still gonna hate ya.
Oh, yeah. Cos when the children of the world find out...
..you ruined their beloved holidays...
..you'll be the biggest monster on earth.
I got 36 hours to save Christmas,...
..or we're all done for.
Every child will hate me.
(cameras click)
You guys, can't we talk about this, huh? Fairy to fairy?
Fairy? You don't know the meaning of the word.
You just couldn't help yourself, could you?
Ooh, look at the time.
Tooooooooth! (echoes)
It's hopeless. We'll never fix it in time.
Oi! Where d'you think you're going?
Wallit house. Fast.
- But... but... - They need you. For a makeover.
- Ohh... Aauuuuughh! - In Accounts.
I'm getting the money back.
But... but the Fairy Hunters, they'll see you.
Not the way I'm goin'.
It's suicide.
Or... could be cool.
Now, hear this. Tooth has escaped.
Forget about the money. Find Mrs C and get magic back.
It's the only way to save Christmas now.
They say she lives at the end of the rainbow... in a magic castle.
You need to get out more.
Follow this map to a f... friend of mine.
There's others like us, up there, looking for her.
(whooshing)
You g... go, girl.
(screams)
(traffic roars, sirens)
A week ago, Plug cameras snapped this.
Notice the distinctive belt worn by the intruder.
Closer, and we see "Dental Re-imbursement Operative 565".
The official police report called it "a garden-variety burglary"...
..but I think it's something more.
(whispers) A Tooth Fairy.
This is the evidence we've been waiting for. Let's move out!
(henchmen) Uurgh!
(growl)
That's right, girl. Daddy's going to catch himself a Tooth Fairy.
- (growl) - (cackles)
(cackling echoes)
Tough day, ma'am?
Oh,... you know...
Do you ever feel you've had your big chance in life and you're just...
..throwing it away?
(door creaks)
(desperate grunting)
(female voice mutters) Where is it?
It's got to be here...
Running out of time... (sighs) Where's the money?
# We got to move these refrigerators
# We got to move these colour TVs
# Ow! #
There you are!
I've been waiting.
- Thomas, do you know this person? - Uhh...
- (mouths) - Uh... buh... um...
She's a refugee... and...
..she's...
- Got amnesia. - Right. Because her...
- (Tooth) Herrrr... - (Tolly, in higher pitch) Herrrr...
..hairdo...
..is too tight?
Y... yeah.
What are you guys wearing?
- (phone) - Nobody move.
- C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! - (Mom) Hello?
That was great. But... cough it up.
- Cough what up? - The money!
lmpossible. He was at the library.
I want it all back, and now.
You're her!
He did?
She's the... Mmm Fairy.
Would you knock it off, Tol-ly?
Thomas J Wallit!
In here, double time!
That was the Buy 'N' Binge. They said you came by today, giving away money.
- A lot of money. - Tell me you didn't...
- Ahh! - Honey, have you seen my...
Whoa. Nice threads.
Dad, someone dropped this off today, said he'd... heard about your band.
Yeah?
(hyperventilates)
Need a signature here.
Honey, what's goin' on?
(whistles)
Incomin'!
Surprise!
(Tooth) What... have you... done?
(whirring)
- (camera clicks repeatedly) - Look at her. She's no Tooth Fairy.
She's a tooth ache! (munches)
Rule number one: never go up in the daytime.
But desperate times mean desperate measures.
(hiccups) Oh, my ulcer...
All right, people! Operation Money Back needs some volun...
- ..teers. - (clock chimes)
29 hours to Christmas! I'll do it myself! (hiccups)
Mrs C, what are you looking at?
(hiccups)
Get outta the way!
(tyres squeal)
I can't believe you got our kids involved in some sort of crime ring.
Crime ring? Who do I know in a crime ring?
Guys, it's stuff to make you happy!
Tommy, Tommy, did all this stuff come from, like,... someone else's house?
You mean, did we steal it? No. We bought it with real money.
- I don't want one of your stories. - I'm not making it up, Mom.
We've got bags of it.
Right...
..here.
(Rabbit) Ohhh, not the money! Not the money!
- I don't believe it! - (crashing)
The money is gone! Oh, this is the end!
I'm gonna get to the bottom of this.
- (Rabbit wails) - Will you cover me?
(Rabbit) We're over! We're over, we're finished!
Who's that?! Who's com... Who's coming in here now?!
(starts)
- Wa-huhh! What... - You... you...
- (Rabbit) Huh... What... - (Tooth) What are you doing here?
(tyres squeal)
- Fairy Hunter! - Tooth Fairy, dead ahead.
Bogey at two o'clock.
I'm going in. Going in...
Plug your ears!
(feedback)
There are so many different kinds of carpets,...
..it's hard to know where to begin.
Whuhh...
(bleeps)
(both yawn)
- (yawns) - There's the shag carpet,...
..the area rug...
..and its little cousin, the doormat.
There's the Persian carpet, the Oriental rug,...
- ..the floor rug,... - (snores)
- ..the toupee. - (snores)
Out! Get out, you rotten humans!
Make him let 'em go!
Are you kidding? He'll make me spend my wonder years cleaning toilets.
Tooth, come home! They'll eat you alive out there.
It's too dangerous for our kind.
- (engine starts) - (hiccups)
(device bleeps)
I'll be the most hated creature on earth.
Can't you just wave your magic wand or s... something?
No, I can't just wave my magic wand.
Just an idea.
Forget about the money. Find Mrs C and get magic back.
It's the only way to save Christmas now.
They say she lives at the end of the rainbow... in a magic castle.
I can't wave my magic wand,...
..but I might know someone who can.
I am outta here.
Listen. You need us.
Make you a deal. We help you...
..and you get our mom and dad back.
Deal.
Hey, kid!
"Oh, what did you do today, Tom?"
"The usual. Woke up a zillionaire, giant rabbit took my folks,...
..got zapped with a sleep ray..."
What's the map for, anyway?
lt'll get us to Mrs C. She's Santa Claus's wife.
(Tolly) We're gonna see Santa?!
I'm gonna ask for peace on earth and for broccoli to taste like candy.
(Tom) Yep. I'm on the road to Crazy Town.
Would someone please tell me what's going on?
# There's a state of emergency An all-girl alert
# Don't try to approach her or you might get hurt...
So now the money's gone I got 27 hours to find magic...
..or Christmas gets the axe and I get blamed. Stop!
# Girl on a mission
That is the dumbest story I ever heard.
Oh, you're the expert(!)
I'm scared about Mom and Dad.
We'll get 'em back, squid. OK?
- I promise. - OK.
I lost my rabbit.
Forget it. We're not going back.
(muffled) Help. Help me.
(snorts)
(grunts)
Rabbits and fairies. I want them both.
It's two-for Tuesday. Nab one freak of nature, get one free. (chuckles)
(device warbles)
(device trills)
Two teams. Team Two grabs the fairy, Team One nabs the rabbit.
Hysterical. You're fired.
(growl)
- There's a good girl. - (growling)
Where is she, eh?
Follow the smell. Which direction?
(growling)
All right, Hunters.
Hunt.
Home!
# Home, sweet home Home, sweet home
# Home, home, home #
(Rabbit) Ohh... I can't believe it.
This is too awful. What have I done?
Now arriving, Transport Unit number 36...
..and Mom and Dad.
(girl) No-one's here!
I'm Dental Re-imbursement Operative 565.
A friend sent me... from downstairs.
(door unlocks)
We're looking for someone.
Um,... Mrs C.
It's not raining, is it? (sneezes)
Name's Puddle. I'm a Little Helper.
An elf. (sneezes)
Cheese log?
What are you doing up here?
Following rainbows.
31 3 so far. There's a lot of us looking for her.
So what's so special about this Mrs C person, anyway?
- She's got magic. - Like card tricks and stuff?
Better.
(train whistle blows)
Merry... Christmas!
(Puddle) Every toy here was made by magic,...
..once upon a time.
Now we just buy 'em like everyone else.
"Made by magic in the North Pole."
Someday we'll get magic back and make toys the old-fashioned way again.
(device bleeps steadily)
(faster bleeping)
(whirring)
(strangulated noises)
(mobile phone)
Yes. Yes, I am aware the Sceptical Examiner says I'm a fat liar.
My reaction? No comment. I said "No comment", Mother.
I am giving it my all.
Look,... ha... hang on!
(rings)
What?!
You've found them?
Good. Move in.
Use extreme force.
(engines roar)
(snarling)
Precipitation plus sunshine equals chromatical optical phenomenon.
A rainbow!
Got it. She's there. This is the big one, I know it.
Let's move out.
Anyone got a better idea?
- (banging on door) - (buzzer)
(grunts quizzically)
Who is it?
Pizza guy.
I didn't order any.
This way!
(drill whines)
Come on, girlfriend, suck it in!
He really wants to deliver that pizza.
Look, you go on, but you're gonna need some help.
There's a guy I know. He's one of us.
He'll protect you. Danger's his middle name.
(all) Whoaaa...!
(growl)
Find Mrs C! You can do it! Get magic back!
Come on, kid, move it!
- What about Mom and Dad? - Workin' on it, Tol.
Hey, mister! How much for the bike?
(creaking)
What'd you bring them for?
I panicked. (munches)
Sorry. When I'm tense, I eat.
You wouldn't happen to know where the money went, would ya?
No. I didn't think so.
(hiccups)
Peace, peace, peace, peace, peace.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love. I know what this is.
This is a '60s flashback. All your bigger rock stars have 'em.
(mimics electric guitar) Stage dive!
(crunch)
Oh, please. Put 'em to sleep.
Carpeting stands as one of humankind's great innovations.
There's nothing like the feeling of plush...
- All right, people, show's over. - (both snore)
We got 23 hours to Christmas. Let's work this problem.
(Tolly) When are we gonna see Mrs Santa Claus?
(Tooth) We gotta find someone first. Some guy named... JJ.
(Tolly) Sounds like a dog's name.
(Tom) Looks like he lives in...
(all) A golf course?!
So, you're looking for magic, are you?
The only magic I know is a hole in one.
Ooh... Ahh!
Hmm...
Mm...
- Oh, yawn. - We hear danger is your middle name.
Must've mistaken me for someone else.
Name's Jarvis.
Jarvis Jarvis.
And this is my better half, Bon Bon.
- No kidding,... kidding. - Moisturiser, Jarvy?
Are you guys Little Helpers?
How droll. Who told you that?
Your friend Puddle.
Before the Fairy Hunters got her.
Fairy Hunters? You're sure?
Sounds like an A6 scenario, Jarvy.
- I knew it. You're elves. - Bite your tongue!
We're personal protection operatives.
- Fairy godparents. - Retired.
We're looking for Mrs C. Puddle gave us these co-ordinates.
Mrs C! (laughs scornfully)
You'll never find her.
Rainbows and castles, castles and rainbows.
I spent 25 years on Mrs C's trail.
Thrill of the chase, Fairy Hunters nipping at your haunches...
Nothing. Dead end.
So you gonna help, or what?
Listen, kid, I've got a reasonable, quiet life here.
Low fat, high fibre, sensible shoes.
- Niceness to animals and old people. - And totally danger-free.
Of course we'll help.
Let's light this candle!
(glass smashes)
Yee-hah!
(Tooth, wobbly) I'm feeling really good about this...
To-o-o-o-o-om?
Ye-eah, To-o-ol?
Are we the-ere ye-e-et?
(crash)
(birdsong)
Maybe we got the co-ordinates wrong.
Hey!
(Tom) So, aren't you supposed to have wings or somethin'?
(Tooth) No magic, remember?
Just a dead body part. Like your brain.
(Tom) You don't have a lot of friends, do you?
So?
You?
Kids my age think I'm a... flesh-eating virus.
Like that kid who beats you up all the time?
Did you know he likes to pick flowers?
And when no-one's around he wears his mom's shoes.
- You've got dandruff. - It's not dandruff, it's snow.
(laughs) Only Santa can make snow.
I want my rabbit!
(grunts)
Send in the machine.
(engine growls)
(robotic ) Target acquired. E497 2.
Target acquired. Code red.
(Tolly) You've got dandruff. You've got dandruff...
Don't look now. Fairy Hunters.
E497 2. Target acquired.
(laughs) Easy, there, cowboy.
(distant engines)
Run!
(loudspeaker) We are going in. I've got 'em in my sights.
Go on, kids, save yourselves!
What is it with these guys?
- Everyone wants to be a hero. - Come on!
Give up the children and we won't hurt you.
- We're here to take the children. - Not on my watch.
Uh... Wuuhhhhh!
(yelps)
Oh, Jarvy!
It's just like old times.
Yoo-hoo! In here!
In here! Yoo-hoo! In here!
Come on, Tol!
Yoo-hoo, hoo-hoo!
(Tom and Tooth) Uh-oh.
(chortles)
(engine starts)
(Rabbit) Ten hours to Christmas. Time's running out, people!
(lights crackle)
(Tooth) This is cosy.
(snarling)
(trembling voice) Who are you?
Just a humble Joe trying to make a name for himself. And you are?
Late for Christmas.
Ho, ho, ho... hold your horses, Dental Re-imbursement Operative 565.
You have no idea who you're messing with, mister.
You don't scare me. Huh!
Small spaces, surviving on rainwater and hair: that scares me.
Also bagpipes. (whimpers)
But you? No!
So,... tell me about your rabbit friend, and the car wash.
What's in it for me?
What?!
The question of the age: "What's in it for me?"
How about the honour of making Plug a household name?
- (door crashes open) - (footsteps approach)
(door crashes shut)
This is Herbert.
People who know his work call him the Extractor.
(snickers)
Get what you can out of them. Call me when it's over.
Hmm.
(gulps)
Tom! Do something!
(Tom) Listen, mister,... you want some appliances?
We got a house full of 'em.
Tom!
(Tom) When I was four, my dad put a tracking device inside my nose.
I signal him: hmm! And... and he shows up with an army.
(whimpering)
(gasps)
(Extractor growls)
Uuaahhhh!
Oh, it's so good to see one of my own!
How is it downstairs, is the routine still the same?
Hey, do you know,...
..I actually miss it.
(coughs)
Kids, I'm a Tooth Fairy.
I've been wanderin' round for years, trying to find Mrs C.
But all I know is teeth. That's how I wound up being a dentist.
But do you know what?
I'm OK with that.
- You were looking for Mrs C? - I found her, too.
- Rewind. - You found Mrs C?
Oh, yeah. Trying to get, you know, magic and that.
But, well,... she's got a few issues.
So now I'm just doin' my part.
You know, working for Plug.
But I do make sure nobody gets hurt.
(roar)
(snoring)
(slowing down) The History Of Wall-to-Wall Carpeting.
There's nothing like the feeling of plush, foot-friendly carpeting.
Where would we be without it?
(creature snores)
The belt must have sent them to sleep.
Batteries are low but I think it still works.
You gotta tell us how to find Mrs C.
Yeah, we've been following rainbows left and right.
(growl)
Quick, get in.
(grunts)
Take the belt.
(grunts)
- Quick. - (splutters)
If you wanna catch the rainbow, it comes every day at 9am.
(roar)
- Get him! - (screams)
(splash)
Mom?
Dad?
(laughs)
All right, there, big guy. That was quite a fall.
What are you doing here?
- (whispers) Shall we tell him? - (whispers) Yeah.
We're secret operatives.
- Operatives? - Yes, that is right.
- Agents working for Mrs C. - Both of you?
- Together? - That's right.
Our home life, the... the whole unhappy-marriage thing...
Your dad's flaky-musician routine!
- It's just an act. - It's a cover.
Everything's gonna be OK now. I promise.
Ohh!
What about Tolly?
My sister(!)
You don't have a sister, Tom.
She was eaten by bears. Remember?
- (starts) - (Tolly) Tom, wake up.
(water drips, distant chittering)
- Where are we? - In some kind of underground lake.
We fell in.
Your sister's little friend saved our bacon.
(scoffs) A fish?
(bubbles angrily)
Ow!
She's, uh, not a fish, Tom, she's a mermaid.
(Tooth) Apparently the kid speaks Mermaid.
What kind of rainbow turns up every day at nine o'clock?
(bubbles)
(bubbles quizzically)
(bubbles)
- You got something, Tol? - (bubbles)
- She knows where it is? - Well...?
What was that you said?
If you want to catch a rainbow, they come every morning at 9am.
What does that mean exactly?
I'm strong.
I'm OK, I'm on a beach.
- (roar) - (screams)
Where are they going? Tell me!
Ice cream, cocoa, silk pyjamas, lotion...
(snarling)
Bye-bye, mermaid.
Wow!
Rainbow Clean and Fresh!
"Commercial laundry for 100 years." Guys!
(Tom) That's the rainbow?
(all strain)
(gasps)
Come on. Shh.
(sniffs)
Huh?
(screams)
- Hey, what's going on? - (growls)
(yells)
(groans)
(Tom) What about vampire teeth? Do you do them, too?
(Tooth) Please. There's totally no such thing as vampires.
- Shark teeth? - Nuh-uh.
- Dog teeth? - Nope.
- False teeth? - Shush.
You're nervous about seeing Mrs C, aren't you?
Who, me?
Nah.
# They had imagination Used their eyes to see
# Dance to the mountain, baby, fly with me
# Cos we know there's something they don't see
# Yeah, stand up, and you hold onto me... #
(Tom) A castle at the end of the rainbow!
(thunder)
(booming male voice) Yes...?
Yeah, uh,... (laughs weakly) we're looking for Mrs C.
(voice) All those for Mrs C...
..must first survive these trials three.
(thunder)
(voice) Those who wish an open door,...
..find the password on the floor.
Uh,...
..there's nothing on the floor.
S,... T,...
..E,... V,... E.
Steve?
Uh,... the... the password is "Steve".
(voice) Yes...!
The password is "Steve".
OK, big guy. Let us in.
(voice) First, ring the bell but not the buzzer.
Three tries in all, and not another.
That's a lousy rhyme.
(voice) Best I could do on short notice.
(buzzer)
- You're gonna blow it. - You're making me nervous.
What happens if he blows it?
(voice) He falls into a vat of angry snails.
Could be worse.
- Shut up. You're making me sweat. - Well, don't.
Then shut up!
(voice) Works for me.
Could you hurry it up?
(voice) The final test!
(both groan)
I don't have time for this.
(yells)
(shocked gasps)
- Oh, dear! - Well!
What a mess!
(dove coos)
It's all right, everybody! Everything's under control.
Well, you made it.
Congratulations.
I thought the breaking-down-the-door bit was excessive, but not to worry.
(Tooth) OK, where are we and who are you?
Around the world they say that I'm...
..the one and only king of rhyme. It's me!
The voice of choice, the host with the most, the man...
- We get it. - So, erm, you want to see... Mrs C.
Yes, I'm, er, sorry about all that "spooky castle" stuff back there...
..but it keeps away the riffraff.
Heavenly Acres Home for Retired Magicians?
- (woman screams) - Come on, come on, come on.
Now, you have to be careful.
Erm,... Mrs C is in a terrible mood.
One of the residents... levitated her poodle.
- We can't get it off the ceiling. - (woman) What's all that racket?!
Er,... er,... nothing, er, ma'am.
Er, it's just your... your next appointment... is here.
Here we go.
- Break a leg! - Hey... hey!
- Where's he going? - (lock clicks)
(door creaks)
(tinkling clock chime)
- (door closes) - Tick-tock, tick-tock.
Um,... are you Mrs C?
- Who wants to know? - I need magic. Big time.
May I ask why?
Er,... we just wanna help our mom and dad.
If it's magic you want, got it coming out of my ears.
No-one can make 50 bucks disappear quicker than I can.
Just say the magic words "new handbag" and poof!
Turn it down, dear, I'm in a meeting.
- (cheery song on TV) - Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
- (whispers) Santa!
Oh-ho... oh-ho...
(laughter on TV)
Children, this magic sounds pretty powerful.
The world would have to be a pretty wonderful place to deserve it.
All I know is I got till sunset to make things right...
..or the whole world's gonna hate me.
I don't wanna be hated.
Oh, I see. This is all about you, is it? Bit selfish, don't you think?
But... that's not what I said.
- Sorry, dear, can't help you. - But...
Turn it down or I'll kick it in!
Come on, Tol.
Look, lady, do you know what we've been through?
So you're having a bad day or you think the world's a drag!
Just do something about it...
..cos, if you sit there when you're needed most, you're the selfish one!
Do you know who I am?
Erm, everything all right?
How many of them do you have to hurt before you change your mind?
Yeah, we were... just leaving.
It's to make you happy.
Merry Christmas.
(tinny song on TV)
Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho... Ho-ho-ho-ho!
Tom, where are you going?
FBI, Navy Seals, the Mafia, whatever it takes,...
- ..l'm getting my mom and dad back. - What? Tom!
Wait, Tom,... I wanna help.
Forget it. You don't care about them.
You're just scared people will hate you.
The only one you've cared about this whole time is you.
It's not true.
The money.
- (Plug) Where is she?! - (gasps)
Where's the fairy?
- Where is she? - Put me down!
I would love to put you down.
Now, tell me where your friend the fairy is.
Come on! Oh, stop kicking.
Little brat.
- Where is she? Where's the fairy? - Let me go!
Get off of me!
Yo! You want a piece of me?
- Aah! - The car wash: show me how it works.
(snarling)
Show me.
OK. OK, just don't hurt 'em.
Please.
Oh, what's the use?
No money means no Christmas, no teeth, no us.
We might as well just fade away.
Come on!
Where's your spirit? Ahhh!
Remember when you did Easter duty after eating 400 pounds of fudge?
Or the time your belt broke...
..so you bored that boy back to sleep with the story of your life.
Sir, you'd better have a look.
(bleeping)
(whirring)
We're done for! Hunters! They're coming!
(all wail)
This wouldn't be happening if we still had... magic.
(Tolly) Where are we going?
My house.
First time I ever have friends over and it has to be like this.
Now arriving,...
..Fairy Hunters.
(clanking)
The kids.
The kids!
Showtime!
(squealing)
(kids) Mom! Dad!
(scream)
Secure the exits.
- Gut the joint. - (crash)
Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?
A talking giant rabbit.
Tommy, what's going on?
I know you. You used to put your mother's bridgework under the pillow.
Don't you know how greedy that is?
I call it initiative.
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
Who are you, the Cheesecake Fairy?
Mr Plug, on behalf of the children of the world...
..and all that is decent and good in the universe,...
..I demand that you leave at once.
Zip it, fuzzball.
You bet. I'll... be over here...
..if anyone needs me. (hiccups)
Who's the wacko?
I'm the Easter Bunny's evil twin.
The Tooth Fairy's ugly stepsister.
I'm roadkill to reindeer, sun lamps to snowmen.
I am... the anti-Claus.
(snaps)
(metallic crash)
Knock it off, Plug!
- Mrs C? - She's back!
And she's bad.
Run, Plug.
While you still can.
Ooh. Scary.
Or, as my colleague here would say,... (gulps)
Aaaaaarrrgghh!
(crash)
(gibbers)
- What are you doing here? - I've come to help, old friend.
But why'd you leave us in the first place?
Because the world had got greedy.
Magic didn't matter any more; money did.
But what I didn't realise is...
..that there are a few loving and generous spirits...
..still alive in this world.
All right, lady. You wanna help? Prove it.
Very well. I've got your money.
- (all gasp) - The garbage men, they work for me.
They took your money to keep it safe.
What about m... magic?
Oh...
Back off, or Fluffy gets it.
Tolly, will you get back here?!
But he's the Easter Bunny!
Nobody's called me that in years.
Laugher. Tears. Nausea. Grab the kid.
- No! - It's OK, we'll take care of this.
(roar)
(cackles)
- When we get to the top, bury them. - (growls)
(Mom) Tolly!
They've sealed the ducts!
And cut the circuits.
OK... OK... OK...
(Dad) Whoa. That is a long way up.
(Mom) OK, is there another way out? Hold on.
(grunts)
(chortles)
(screaming)
He's burying us alive!
- I know there's a way out. - You don't know anything.
- Help me out here, lady! - Well,... there is a way out.
You fly.
Poppycock!
This is for you to do, for the ones you love.
Magic is love, and wishes, and wanting to help other people.
And it's here.
Deep inside.
Like a kidney?
Hello. Sceptical Examiner?
You guys want the exclusive of a lifetime?
Send your best man, and tell him to bring his camera.
What?
No, this is not another giant squid!
(engine cuts)
Dad?
- What's this? - No...
It's his jacket. Dad!
- OK, honey... - Dad!
- Dad? - Honey? Honey!
Excuse me, Mrs Wallit.
I think you should see this.
- Dad! - Come here, Big T.
(pants)
But he hates heights.
Talk to him, Mrs Wallit.
- Er,... hello? - (feedback)
H... hello?
What are you doing?
Got no choice! I'm her dad!
What's gotten into you?
Well,... just... had a chance to sleep on things.
You see?
That's magic.
On your left!
Aaagh!
(pants, grunts)
Will you come down now, please, before you get hurt?
I'm, er, writing a new song for the band.
Wanna know what it's about? It's about you.
Anyone who's put up with a flake like me deserves something beautiful.
There's just one problem.
I stink.
I've got no sense of rhythm.
And I... I think I'm tone-deaf.
Whoa!
- (all gasp) - No! No! Can you bring him back?
(Mom) Bring him back!
- Tooth? - I gotta help!
Then fly.
- Show me! - I can't.
It's inside you. You have to want it.
Enough kung-fu mumbo jumbo, lady, I gotta save 'em!
Wow!
That's it? I get more lift from a bag of prunes.
She can do this. But she needs all of you.
You have to want it, too.
(rumbling)
(coughs) If it means getting Rabbit, and the little girl and her dad,...
..then I want magic.
If it helps.
Magic.
Oh, why not?
Magic.
(all gasp)
Take me with you.
I'll try.
Still think she's a loser?
Nah. She's not a loser.
All right, people, let's kick some Fairy Hunter butt!
In the old-fashioned way!
Hi, Dad. Gotta flyyyyyyyyyyy!
Tom?
Come on, Sugar Plum Fairy, let's... ride.
The Sugar Plum Fairy...
..was a wimp.
Please make sure your seat back is upright...
..and your tray table's in its stowed and locked position. Thank you!
Yeeeah!
- Going underground! - Watch out for the car!
(car horn)
(announcer) Welcome to the Festival of Cheese.
- Cheeeeeese! - Ahhh!
Agh, cheese! I hate cheese!
Time for a cleanup!
(dialling bleeps)
Sceptical Examiner, where are you guys?
Ugh! Knock it off! Blurrrrgh!
(Tooth) Let 'em go, Plug.
Or I'll make you.
You and what army?
- Where have you been? - (retches)
(whimpers)
You should really get that looked at.
(gasps)
Huh? Elves!
And fairies! And Tooth Fairies!
It's an army! Yeah! Get 'em!
(all growl)
Wings up and wands out.
Forward!
(all yell)
In you get! In that!
(screams)
(all wail)
- Cowards! - Ow!
Shut it, you.
As my mummy always says, never, ever, ever work without a hostage.
Let her go, chucklehead.
The Sceptical Examiner was right. You're just a big fat liar.
You...
You worthless,...
..lowlife,...
..bottom-feeding...
..trailer trash!
(mobile rings)
(sighs)
- Yes, Mummy. - (shrill nagging)
I am. I am worthy of his memory.
Stage dive!
Aaaaaarrrgghh!
(crunch)
(roar)
- Tolly! - That tickles! (giggles)
Daddy, can we keep her? She's so cute.
- Tolly, are you OK? - Everything all right?
Mr Plug.
I've examined your claim thoroughly.
You're from the Sceptical Examiner! Oh! Afternoon.
Did you see? Did you see inside?
As is typical of your claims with us,...
..there is nothing extraordinary or unusual in any way to report.
But the rabbit... and the zing... and the wheeee... and the zhooom...
We're not in the fruitcake business, Mr Plug.
Evidently you are.
Please, shh,... (whispers) don't call again.
I've got video.
(whimpers) No! No!
Dad's here, we're all right. We're all right.
Tolly, you're all right, you're safe.
Ohh, got you back.
Got you back, got you all safe, goodness me.
- How did you get here? - I ran, sweetheart.
I ran, darling, I ran all the way. Goodness me.
Little T, are you all right?
Ah, got you safe. Tom, Tom!
Come here. Come here, oh...
(Tolly) We saw fairies and they were flying!
There were Fairy Hunters, and they had a huge tunnel, and we won!
That's wonderful...
(Tom) So, that's my story.
How me and my family and the craziest Tooth Fairy ever found magic again...
..and got the holidays back on track.
Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho...
Herbert the Extractor escaped and became a professional soccer player.
Those wacky golfers had a pretty good year.
And Plug spent the rest of his holidays in jail.
As for my family,...
..my dad started a car-wash record store for the musically challenged...
..and Mom went to work for Mrs C.
(happy rumbling)
Tolly got to keep the thing in the cage...
..and she even got a new baby-sitter.
Everything's fine, Mrs Wallit.
You and Mr Wallit just try and enjoy yourselves. Ciao.
And me,... Tom Wallit?
I made a friend who liked me,...
..even though I'm a flesh-eating virus.
A friend who taught me that magic is inside all of us.
Deep inside.
Like...
..a kidney.
- # We are family - # Yeah
# I got all my sisters with me
# Mm-hm
# We are family
# Get up, everybody, and sing
# We are family
# I've got all my sisters with me #
( # Oden.: Do You Believe)
- # Whoo! - # Ba-da, ba-da, ba-ba, ba-da-da-da
# Ba-da, ba-da, ba, ba, ba
# Ba-da, ba-da, ba-ba, ba-da-da-da
# Ba-da, ba-da, ba
# Do you believe in somewhere?
# A place so far
# Where we can fly so high
# Like a shooting star
# Close your eyes
# And count to ten
# And I'll take you there
# And bring you back again
# You won't see me falling
# Defiant in the space above
# Can you hear me calling you?
# Shouting from the rooftops
# Do you believe it's forever? Always gonna be
# Love whatever Just hold onto me
# I'll take you there if you show me love
# And I'll show you heaven We can really see
# A million miles, we'll take a look at you
# I'll take you there if you show me love, love, love
# I'll show you stars
# That you've never seen
# I'm counting down
# In my sky machine
# Give me a nickel
# See my fingers fold
# I'll turn it into silver
# I'll turn it into gold
# You won't see me falling
# Defiant in the space above
# Can you hear me calling you?
# Shouting from the rooftops
# Do you believe it's forever? Always gonna be
# Love whatever Just hold onto me
# I'll take you there if you show me love
# And I'll show you heaven We can really see
# A million miles, let's take a look at you
# I'll take you there if you show me love, love, love
# Do you believe in forever and that it's gonna be?
# I can take it, baby You just hold onto me
# If you show me love then we can be there soon
# I can hear you calling I'm shouting from the rooftop
# Do you believe it's forever Always gonna be
# Love whatever Just hold onto me
# I'll take you there if you show me love, love, love #
Subtitles by Will Mann Intelfax Media Access